Corrupted Wishing Well

First topic message reminder :

I'm sure most of you know this game -- make a wish, and have it come true. Problem is, the wishing well is corrupted and as such the fulfillment of the wish goes terribly awry!

To those who don't know what I'm talking about, here's the gist:
1. Grant the wish above you, making it go wrong somehow.
2. Make a wish yourself.
3. Lather, rinse, repeat.

For example:

Person 1: I wish for some sushi.

Person 2: Granted, but it seems that the fish has gone rotten, and it's given you food poisoning!
I wish for a puppy.

Person 3: Granted, but it's vicious and it tears up your furniture.
I wish I was the smartest person in the world.

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I shall start. c:

I wish for a pair of cute little rats. <3

Granted but from now on any fruit you bought was moldy except for those strawberries.
i wish i had a cow o.o

Granted, but it ate everything, and didnt give you any milk.

I wish that there were more epic pokemon games.

granted but then nintendo ran low on budget making so many more epic pokemon games and eventually crashed and never made any more games at all.
I wish for a brownie XD

Granted, but i nabbed it and ate it before you could.

I wish my mum would stop complaining at me.

granted but then she started staring at you all day with her mouth moving but no sounds coming out. She never blinked O_O
i wish for something to wish about

Granted, but then you decided not to wish for it, and the problem started all over again.

I wish more people watched Doctor Who.

(ooh me too XD)
Granted,but then they join the rp and they are really horrible at rping and yell all the time and act like jerks.
i wish we didnt have to wait so long for more Doctor Who

TURDS

Granted, but the company wnet bust so they stopped making them altogether.

I wish i could decide on what the creatures in the rp look like.

granted but then you decide no tot make them look like that and start all over again.
i wish i knew what the heck was going on

Granted, but then a crowd of random people rush past and you get confused again.

I wish Sahdow would just admit the truth.

granted but then you are still confused so we just give up on this conversation XD
i wish i could shape shift like Kani >:O

xD
Granted, so go create a character XD but you get stuck as a worm.

I wish life was easier.

granted but then its boring because its so easy.
i wish there was a shapeshifting pokemon :O

Granted, but you couldnt catch one XD

I wish I had a really unique character that no one ever tried to copy.

granted but then everyone got angry at you because your character was so great and in rp they were mean to you as well as in ooc.
i wish i knew a great way to take a rayquaza char to the next level

granted but then they ate everyone on the planet.
(lol thats what i was going to say XD but he doesnt really shapeshift. He just takes on their appearance. i mean one that shape shifts any time not just when it sees something XD)
i wish that the carnival stayed in my town longer

Granted,but it catches on fire,and burns to the ground

I wish there was another pmd game

Granted, but the plotline was crappy XD

I wish i knew what to wear to this christening.

christening?

Granted, but it wasn't appropriate for the occasion
I wish I was a luxray

granted but then you can't get back to being a person and no one understands what you say. Oh and you have a really mean trainer XD
i wish i had a pet turtle ;~;

Granted, but I ate him
I wish for more wishes...again

granted but then you run out of wishes once more.
i wish for... a hair tie XD

Granted, but there was a typo and you ended up getting hair pie
I wish for more brownies

Granted but I ate them all XD

I wish I had a hair pie