Corrupted Wishing Well

First topic message reminder :

I'm sure most of you know this game -- make a wish, and have it come true. Problem is, the wishing well is corrupted and as such the fulfillment of the wish goes terribly awry!

To those who don't know what I'm talking about, here's the gist:
1. Grant the wish above you, making it go wrong somehow.
2. Make a wish yourself.
3. Lather, rinse, repeat.

For example:

Person 1: I wish for some sushi.

Person 2: Granted, but it seems that the fish has gone rotten, and it's given you food poisoning!
I wish for a puppy.

Person 3: Granted, but it's vicious and it tears up your furniture.
I wish I was the smartest person in the world.

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I shall start. c:

I wish for a pair of cute little rats. <3

Nice use of grammer XD (thats to Aura)
Anyhow i'll wish for Snivy since she didnt put a wish
I wish my cat didnt hate me xD

Granted, but it wants to murder you now.

I wish for a plate of evil cookies~

Wish granted, but they become so good that you eat so much that you become super fat!

I wish my cat came back home.

:c
Granted but then it ignored you and slept on the porch all day long
I wish my sister didnt only come over for cake >>

Wish granted, but now she comes for your death!

I wish Dawn came back from her cruise sooner.

granted but its because the ship crashed and everyone died (morbid much? XD)
i wish that some pokemon didnt have idiotic names. (for example: cubchoo? xD)

Wish granted, but now they're so cool that they're boring. xD

I wish that nothing bad will ever happen! Forevah!

Wish granted, but the world is boring and people start back up with the bad things.

I wish I had a cake.

granted but its made of bugs and dead bodies (ew how do i make up these things? XD)
i wish i had an Australian Shepard *so cute* OH and its not dead or vicious XD

Granted, but is old and ugly.

I wish the maid came back. I hate doing chores!

granted but then shes lazy and makes you do the chores anyhow
i wish that there was something going on other then my sister sitting on her butt watching Criminal Minds

Granted. Now doomsday is coming.

I wish for a perfect little parrot thats perfect. and no one is jealous of it. and it never gets boring. and its pretty. and smart. and has a perfect voice. and is a little pure angel. period. XD

granted but then its squawks and squawks and you think its perfect but everyone else hates it and never talks to you ever again and you live an isolated life. (lol im such a downer XD)
I wish for ice cream :O

Granted, but it melts the second you touch it.

I wish for ramen! 8D

granted but then its really gross
i wish more people were online

Granted, but everyone goes onto the C-Box and it gets really laggy and blows up.

I wish I had the permission to add new Pokemon to the dungeons.

granted but then everyone hates your additions and ignores you and never rps with you.
i wish that Zash would stop crying :c

(Old topic ftw! yes, his is how bored I get XD)
Granted but now he is stabbing himself instead.
I wish that the Doctor Who song would get out of my head.

Granted! But now the noise The Tardis makes is stuck in your head.

I wish for world peace.

Granted, but now everything is so peaceful it's so boring you'll die of boredom.

I wish my baby fish will grow up quicker.

Granted, but the fish kept growing and turned into a monter.
I wish that there was no school today :/

(Heheh i have a delay >D)
Granted but then you missed a huge test and even with the extra day to study you didnt and then you failed and were kept back a grade

I wish it wasn't so much work to make myself breakfast xD

Granted but your breakfast it air.
I wishI could tell the future.

Granted, but you can only see bad things.
I wish the site will blow up. (xD i was running out of ideas)

Granted but the explosion makes the e net crash
I wish I could dunk